Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
i out mim tonsoeep
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