Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Randomize
