I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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