So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize