My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
