my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i would punch a child for taco bell
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
