How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
