I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
oh god the rape fog is back!
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
