I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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