school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
