i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Is it penis luge time yet?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
