i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I need to sanitize my soul.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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