I have demons in me.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
