are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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