No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize