The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
