Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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