I wish I could teleport
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
