The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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