come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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