Just mADE A PArabola og urine
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
