i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
bring money and cleavage
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
