He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I love you.
Bad choice
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
