This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize