I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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