if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
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