i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
