Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
