I have demons in me.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
