Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm jealous of your bromance
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize