So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
