It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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