I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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