I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
