yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
