whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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