Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
