and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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