have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize