my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
