My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Green mimosas i think yes
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
