Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
