Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
