She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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