I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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