She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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