last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Randomize
