i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
My breasts were aching with rage.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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