dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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