You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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