I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize