My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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